First Parish Sermon Archive

The debate that raged inside my head and my heart these last few weeks over whether or not to give this sermon has been fierce. Most of you who have known me for any length of time know that sustained personal attention is something I avoid with a passion - yet there is no way for me to raise the issue of Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender rights in post-election America without having it be personal.

My internal monologue kept coming back to the same question: “I have tried to stand on the side of justice, equality and fairness my whole life for others why hesitate now?” Which led me to wonder if there was more than just revealing more personal aspects of myself than I am comfortable with that was giving me pause and the answer came back yes. Yes because there is a difference in what needs to be said and done.

One of the songs I have on my workout mix asks the question “what have you done today to make you feel proud?” painfully when asking myself the question of what have I done of late to advocate for a minority group of which I am a proud member the answer came back not enough not enough because I had lulled myself into thinking that there wasn’t much to be done. Equality was on the march good progress was being made.

The U.S. was going to become a marriage equality sandwich with equal marriage becoming the law on either side of the country then the two waves of equality would move toward each other as more states got on the right side of history. I let myself think that as this happened passing federal legislation making it illegal to discriminate against, Bisexual, Transgender, gay and Lesbian Americans was sure to pass this time around with a new Congress and a new administration in the White House besides there are so many other important issues that needed my time and energy.

But that all changed on election day when Proposition 2 in Florida and Proposition 102 in Arizona passed making those two states the most recent states to write discrimination against the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender community into their constitutions, when the voters in Arkansas voted to become the latest, not the only, state where it is illegal for me to adopt a child. Everything changed on Election Day when the voters in Arkansas spoke overwhelmingly saying that because I am a lesbian I am not fit to be a parent.

Everything changed on Election Day because of those three states, and yet those actions were amazingly dwarfed by what happened in California with the passage of Proposition 8. The majority of voters in California did not just write discrimination into that state’s constitution they took away existing civil rights from tax-paying law-abiding citizens who just happen to be Gay, Bisexual, Transgender or Lesbian and that should scare the begeebies out of every American.

How could it happen that the democratic presidential ticket carried California with 61% of the vote and Prop 8 still passed with 52%? What happened in California created a seismic shift in the imperative and resolve of the Bisexual, Lesbian, Transgender and Gay community to act up and act out to speak up and speak out for what is the civil rights struggle of our generation. A civil rights struggle that Coretta Scott King spoke up and out for with great passion and much kindness during her lifetime.

Within days of the election I found myself re-reading Dr. Martin Luther King Jr’s “Letter from a Birmingham Jail” parts of which were this morning’s Responsive Reading. It is the document in which Dr. King declared that no one has the right sit out the struggle of others because “injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.”

I was drawn back to Dr. King’s letter for many reasons primarily because he was writing to an audience that surprisingly was not yet fully supportive of his actions and his resolve - white colleagues who were considered moderate theologically and socially and yet who had gone about criticizing his actions, cautioning him that it wasn’t the right time to push back against social norms and the laws of segregation, telling him that people weren’t ready just yet to change - that change doesn’t happen overnight.

Dr. King’s letter to an already sympathetic albeit hesitant and not yet truly committed audience was especially poignant in face of the exuberance - exuberance at least for those who felt the Presidential Election went their way - that change had come and that there was reason to celebrate and not look back.

While an overwhelming majority of the Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender and Gay community voted for the new administration we are not a community that shares the euphoric feeling that lingers after November. Primarily because it is becoming painfully apparent to some that a significant portion of America does not share our pain about the election in general and Proposition 8 specifically.

Certainly in the immediate shock of Proposition 8 passing there was a great outpouring of support and disbelief but since then much of that support and disbelief has been left behind as the excitement builds for the new administration. ‘How did Prop 8 happen in California?’ has been replaced by - ‘well you can’t expect social change to happen overnight’ - or - ‘well at least you can still get married in Massachusetts’ - or - ‘just wait for the next generation this won’t even be an issue.’

While that last one might possibly be true there already exists an aging Bisexual, Gay, Lesbian and Transgender population that grows poorer as they grow older; an elderly population that is being discriminated against now at the federal, state and local levels when seeking the same assistance available to their straight contemporaries. There already exists an elderly population that is faced with the realization that with the end of their independence comes the end of their ability to live a safe and honest life. They cannot afford to wait for the next generation.

I know that many of you have done so much for so many - for years if not decades because there is so much to do. I know that many of you have been speaking out for equal rights for Gays, Lesbians, Bisexual and Transgender people for years - I would never and could never diminish or discount that work because I am grateful. But as I said earlier this is a different moment - a moment that if we are to live up to our First Principle - that we would honor the inherent worth and dignity of every individual then now is the time for us all to do more.

But what about the changing of the guard in Washington - won’t that have a positive effect on the struggle for equal treatment under the law for all citizens? In “Letter From a Birmingham Jail” Dr. King answering those who would have the protests in Birmingham put on hold in order to give the new mayor who was seen to be more “gentle” than the outgoing mayor a chance wrote “that the new Birmingham administration must be prodded as much as the outgoing one, before it will act.” Regardless of his friendliness Dr. King wrote that like the mayor before him the new mayor is “dedicated to maintenance of the status quo.”

It is true that President-Elect Obama is considered to be more ‘gay friendly’ than any other person to hold the office of President. Yet when asked why he doesn’t support gay marriage Mr. Obama said; “I believe that marriage is the union between a man and a woman. Now, for me as a Christian - for me - for me as a Christian, it is also a sacred union. God’s in the mix.”

There is widespread doubt within the Bisexual, Transgender, Lesbian and Gay community that without prodding and a growing chorus of support the new administration will not spend any political capital to further the cause of equal treatment under the law for all citizens. Because his theocratic tendencies are not to support full and equal rights we need to prod our new President so he can find the political and personal courage to change his mind and the law.

Because that is what we are talking about equal treatment under the law - the assurance that the government will prosecute if someone is fired from a job or denied housing because of their sexual orientation; the right to serve openly in our military or be eligible for the 1,318 different rights and protections that are denied us because our federal government prohibits us from marrying those whom we love.

There is a federal law signed by President Clinton ‘The Defense Of Marriage Act’ that says that Ken has the right to be married in all 50 states but I do not. Even those of us who are legally married in Massachusetts and now Connecticut are not eligible for those federal rights and privileges.

It has been said that being allowed to marry in two states is enormous social change if we wait over time more states will follow suit social - change can only happen over time and I need to be more patient.

As Dr. King wrote “wait has almost always meant never…….justice too long delayed is justice denied.” Putting aside, for a moment, the eloquence and wisdom of Dr. King let’s consider time and try to figure out just how much time is the right amount of time it takes for laws to change. What follows is a small part of a much more detailed time line of the struggle for equal rights for Bisexual, Transgender, Lesbian and Gay Americans.

In April of 1992 almost a million people took part in the last national march on Washington, D.C. for Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender civil rights. So I ask is 16 and a half years enough? The first national march on Washington for Gay Rights took place in 1979 almost a year after Harvey Milk was assassinated - is 29 years enough? The first rally for Gay and Lesbian civil rights took place in Philadelphia on July 4, 1965 - is 43 years long enough? The first Lesbian rights organization was founded in San Francisco in 1955 - is 53 years enough? The first Gay Rights organization was founded in Chicago in 1924 - is 84 years enough?

Emma Goldman - a voice that could not be ignored - began speaking out publically for Homosexual Rights in 1910 - is almost 100 years enough? The first trial and conviction of a woman accused of being a lesbian took place in Plymouth, MA in 1649 - is 350 years enough? Moreover, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender and Gay people have been part of every community, of every generation, of every civilization, of every culture since the beginning of time. So I ask is forever enough?

Just because most of America has not been paying attention does not mean that we are a new voice in the struggle for our own basic civil rights. Just because most of America has not been listening does not mean we have silently lived our lives in the shadows. Just because most of America has not cared enough to realize the enormity of the toll our community has borne does not mean that we have lived in peace. Bisexual, Gay, Transgender, Lesbians and our allies have been marching and organizing for years upon years. Transgender, Lesbian, Gay, Bisexuals and our allies have been pounding on the door of equal treatment under the law and equal opportunity for decades upon decades. Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender Americans have been killed and injured because of who we are - we have suffered physical and emotional violence for centuries upon centuries. Enough is enough.

There is some of the anger - it is righteous and it is real. It is our great challenge to use this anger stoked as it has been by shame of Prop 8 as energy for our efforts, fuel for our vocal passion but not as the product of our actions.

We are a peaceful loving people and now is our time, we are the ones we have been waiting for and it is time for all of us to lift our voices loudly, proudly and without hesitation and say that the time has come when it is no longer acceptable that there exists in this country a group of tax-paying law-abiding citizens who are treated unequally under the law.

We need to do this together because as Jon Stewart said this week “it is a travesty that people have forced someone who is gay to have to make their case, that they deserve the same basic rights.”

There are some who have said that the fact that I am an out lesbian minister living in a predominantly straight community has had some small measure of benefit not just for Transgender, Gay, Bisexual and Lesbian youth and adults in the area but for those who identify themselves as straight as well. I have to admit that there have been times that I have believed that might be true.

Yet since the election I have begun to question if the full measure of who I am - living where I do perhaps has done more harm than good - that perhaps I have unwittingly contributed to the lack of urgency in the ally community to the issue of equal marriage and equal treatment under the law.

I have begun to question whether or not by blending into this community, as much as any minister can blend into any community, if by doing so I have perhaps contributed to an understanding among those who do not identify as Bisexual, Lesbian, Transgender or Gay that our lives are fundamentally the same - because the are not.

I don’t know what it is like to walk into CVS in Wayland center, or the Natick Collection or Fenway Park and not worry if it is safe to hold my wife’s hand. I don’t know what is like to live in a world where I don’t have to think before I speak for fear of calling her hon or sweetheart because I know what can happen if the wrong person hears me say just that.

I don’t know what it is like to have my government acknowledge me as a full citizen. I don’t know what it is like to turn on the television and not hear how I am wrecking the institution of marriage, or that I am by the very fact of my existence immoral - grotesque - sick - that I am unfit to be a parent, or a teacher or a minister - that it is not safe for me to be around children - not because of the content of my character, because I am a lesbian.

I do know what it is like to live in a world where the very core of who I am is dismissed as a mere choice - as if it were akin to picking out new drapes.

How is it possible that there are those who still believe that after thousands of years of oppression - after thousands of years of violence against us - after thousands of years of governments trying to legislate us out of existence - of religious organizations creating doctrine to demonize us - of individuals who would demean and threaten us - and still do - how is it possible for anyone to think that the strength my community has needed to endure all of that and more hangs solely by the thin filament of a choice? The enormity of our strength comes from being who we are - the fact of us will never change no matter how many people would wish it were so.

I do know the spiritual, psychic, emotional, and physical energy it takes to get up every day and live in a world that at best dismisses me. And I’m lucky because I live in the relative, but by no means safe confines of Metro-West Boston it is painful to think what it takes for my Transgender, Gay, Bisexual and Lesbian brothers and sisters to go about living their daily lives in places like Little Rock, AR, or Tallahassee, FL, or Phoenix, AR and now for crying out loud Los Angeles, CA.

I know what it is like to come within a hairs breadth of physical harm because of who I am - but thankfully I am one of the lucky ones because I have only endured the threat of physical violence. The latest Justice Department statistics show crimes against Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender people rose by 6% from 2006 to 2007. Just last week a young man was killed in New York City because his attackers thought he was gay.

I know all too well that this kind of violence is nothing compared to the violence my government has wrought on my community. Had the AIDS pandemic started in a community that my government actually cared about - had it not been known as “the gay cancer” then perhaps my government would not have ignored for years the request by the Center for Disease Control for funding for much needed research and education.

If action had been taken earlier who knows how many lives could have been saved - how much suffering could have been avoided. So many lost and so many people telling us it was our fault. Yet starting in the early 1980’s in the face of our government’s sinful indifference the Bisexual, Lesbian, Transgender and Gay community did what it had to do - we came together, we tended to the sick and buried our dead. We did so in very large measure on our own.

The anguish fashioned by indifference and institutionalized inequality is more palpable in the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender community since the voters of California took our rights away than I have ever known since the AIDS crisis of the 1980’s. Yet we cannot succeed without the strong and steadfast support of our allies. We know there is much to be done and that there are those who though they consider themselves allies - ours is not their most pressing issue.

Yet, as Dr. King wrote, “we are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny.” If it is unacceptable to you regardless of your sexual orientation that our government treats people unequally under the law based on sexual orientation that what shall we do about it? So I ask what shall we do together?
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Proud by Heather Small and Peter Vetesse
TalkingPointsMemo.com
Saddlebrook Presidential Candidates Forum August 17, 2008
“Letter From a Birmingham Jail” Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., April 16, 1963
The Daily Show December 9, 2008
“Letter From a Birmingham Jail”, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., April 16, 1963